This is the last in a 3 part series of posts based on an interview with Phil Gerbyshank. Come back tomorrow for Rick’s reflections on the series or subscribe to the blog. Read other posts from the interview»

I grew up in a really poor household. I had two younger brothers, and was on food stamps most of my childhood. I knew from early on that I never wanted to be that way.

My dad got up at 4:00 AM to milk cows. My mom would get up early to go to the nursing home, or stayed up late to bartend or work other jobs. I just realized early on that that was expected of me.

My only regret in going to work at such a young age was that I came to value money more than I should. Unfortunately that lesson stuck for much of my life. When I was in the navy, right after high school, instead of enjoying where I was, I spent a lot of time managing a shoe department. When I was in college I always worked a couple of jobs. So, yeah, I spent a lot of time working, a lot of time valuing money instead of valuing relationships or valuing experience.

I still work harder than I should. I don’t know if it’s a lesson that I will ever fully learn. But, I’m getting much better at saying no. I’m getting better at suggesting other people, at not getting myself entangled in too much.

I’m not gonna lie to you: saying “no” is hard. It’s a daily struggle. I’m always wondering, is this the right balance? Am I doing the right thing for the right reasons at the right time?

I have a keynote speech that’s called “Make a Plan and Make it Great.” The idea is to create a purpose and then run everything through the purpose filter. I’ve really worked hard at doing that more this year than I ever have before. I’m starting to really, really think about my purpose—to think about why I am here, why I am on this planet.

I’ve had two failed marriages.

Something I learned from those failures? Don’t put all of your passion into your work. The work will always be there. It’s Parkinson’s Law. Work will expand to the size of the container you give it, so give it a very small container. I’m still learning that one.

If you have a dream, make sure the other person sees themselves as part of your dream. Because if you don’t, then it’s a lonely dream, a lonely story, and if the other person doesn’t see themselves in your plans then chances are that they will see their way out of your plans.

My brothers have done a lot better job at marriage than I have.

I have a niece that lives 12 minutes from me. Seeing her, spending time with her – it’s slowed me down a bit and helped me to realize that there are more important things than climbing the corporate ladder.

What’s next? My goal next is to transition to speaking, writing, and the coaching full time—probably going to make that transition in 12 to 18 months out.

I just published my second book, Help Desk Manager’s Crash Course. It should be available on Amazon now. I’ve got a couple more books at least inside me.

Basically, I want to break out of corporate America and do my own thing.

Phil Gerbyshak has scaled the corporate mountains and is now chasing his dreams. Five words sum him up nicely: “Energetic, helpful, inspiring, enthusiastic, fun”. He blogs at Make it Great and The Slacker Manager at Bizzia. Follow him on Twitter.

Published Wednesday, August, 12, 2009